{"id":192,"date":"2016-06-28T10:00:35","date_gmt":"2016-06-28T17:00:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/agoodhurt.com\/monology\/?p=192"},"modified":"2016-09-07T13:09:32","modified_gmt":"2016-09-07T20:09:32","slug":"in-silence","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/agoodhurt.com\/monology\/in-silence\/","title":{"rendered":"IN SILENCE"},"content":{"rendered":"<blockquote><p><iframe loading=\"lazy\" title=\"MONOLOGY \/ In Silence\" src=\"https:\/\/player.vimeo.com\/video\/168085557?dnt=1&amp;app_id=122963\" width=\"474\" height=\"267\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"autoplay; fullscreen; picture-in-picture; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\"><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p>EXTENDED VERSION:<\/p>\n<p><strong>[A woman in her mid-thirties. Soft spoken but with an expression that denotes intelligence. She holds a cell phone.]<\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>\u201cMy mother passed away recently\u2026 and quite unexpectedly.<\/p>\n<p>The first few days after her death I missed her so badly that all I did was look at photos of her\u2026 I had this weird fear of forgetting what she looked like\u2026<\/p>\n<p>I went through every single photo she was in. I searched albums, shoeboxes, my phone, my computer\u2026<\/p>\n<p>I paid special attention to the portraits that captured her in a natural\u00a0pose, unaware of the camera\u2019s presence. I would stare at those images for so long\u2026 trying to get a glimpse into her soul, into her real self\u2026 and maybe because of that intensity, the photos began to lose their meaning. \u00a0After a while, they became mere representations of my mother\u2026 lies, in a way.<\/p>\n<p>Then I moved on to her voicemails saved on my phone\u2026 dozens.<\/p>\n<p>I listened to them over and over, very carefully, trying to find my mother in her short greetings, in her requests to call her back as soon as I had time\u2026<\/p>\n<p>They were satisfying at first\u2026 \u00a0like a comfort blanket\u2026<\/p>\n<p>Until one day her messages started to sound artificial\u2026 I could predict what she was about to say; I found myself mocking her inflections\u2026<\/p>\n<p>I realized that, like with the pictures, I had exhausted her recorded voice\u2026<\/p>\n<p>I was devastated, and frustrated. So much so that I began deleting all her messages, one by one\u2026<\/p>\n<p>Until I got to one that was almost two minutes long\u2026 I had always skipped it before because it was a butt call, you know, an accident\u2026<\/p>\n<p>All you can hear in it is a subtle breathing and some creaking sounds, maybe from the chair my mom was sitting on.<\/p>\n<p>But that day I listened to the message, the whole thing this time\u2026<\/p>\n<p>I could feel my mother in that silence, as if she was alive, as if I was spying on her from behind a door. I was curious about her\u2026\u00a0asking myself what was she doing, what was she thinking\u2026<\/p>\n<p>I started crying half way into the recording.<\/p>\n<p>I cried out of happiness because I\u2019d finally felt her in that silence. I was more than happy, I was at peace\u2026 there she was, my mother, living in a question mark\u2026 in an unwritten story.<\/p>\n<p>I deleted the other messages and kept only that one.<\/p>\n<p>Sometimes I play it\u2026 but not too often\u2026 I\u2019m afraid\u00a0to\u00a0wear it out too.\u201d<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<blockquote><p><strong>Are you an actor or director interested in using this monologue? Contact us in ABOUT MONOLOGY!<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0Copyright Abel Gonzalez 2016<\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>EXTENDED VERSION: [A woman in her mid-thirties. Soft spoken but with an expression that denotes intelligence. She holds a cell phone.] \u201cMy mother passed away recently\u2026 and quite unexpectedly. The first few days after her death I missed her so badly that all I did was look at photos of her\u2026 I had this weird &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/agoodhurt.com\/monology\/in-silence\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">IN SILENCE<\/span> <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":201,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"video","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"__cvm_playback_settings":[],"__cvm_video_id":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[22,33,41],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-192","post","type-post","status-publish","format-video","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-love","category-memory","category-video","post_format-post-format-video"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.9 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>IN SILENCE - Monology<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"My mother passed away recently\u2026 and quite unexpectedly. 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